How to Have a Flourishing Relationship With Your Family Who Lives Abroad and Speaks a Different Language

There's no way to know the precise number of people with familial ties abroad. However, the number is likely in the billions. In 2024, the United Nations Department of Economic and Social Affairs (UNDESA) reported that the total number of international migrants was roughly 304 million, and most of those people have families that stayed behind. People move abroad for many different reasons. Regardless, these big moves create hundreds, if not thousands, of miles of separation between families.

It can be tough to maintain a strong relationship if you have family who live in another country and speak a different language. Language differences, distance, and unique ways of life can create a bridge that feels impossible to pass. However, it doesn't have to be that way. There are many ways to maintain a beautiful relationship that flourishes despite the differences. Here are a few tips to pave the way toward a deeper bond that knows no bounds.

One way to maintain a relationship with family is to learn their language. Linguistic differences are among the biggest hurdles families living in separate countries must overcome. That's especially true as generations age and families expand. For instance, someone who moved abroad decades ago may now have adult children. Because those children grow up abroad, they may speak an entirely different language that the extended international family doesn't understand.

Learning your family's language is a grand gesture that goes a long way. Communication is key to building and maintaining a bond that is not hindered by distance or cultural differences. When you can communicate effectively, you can become a big part of one another's lives.

Take classes, invest in language-learning software, and take steps to improve fluency. Even modest headways make a difference, allowing you to close the language gap and enhance mutual understanding.

Of course, the gesture of improving language skills is a two-way street! You alone don't have to do the heavy lifting. Encouraging your family to learn your language can close that communication gap faster. It's a chance to meet in the middle. Gaining gull fluency isn't easy, and it can take years before you feel comfortable enough to have an authentic conversation in a language you don't know.

That goes both ways. However, when both parties take action and work toward improving understanding, you can meet halfway and begin having great conversations even sooner.

Beyond language differences, one common challenge when bonding with family abroad is not being there for everyday life. The family living close by is there to experience everything, from the exciting to the mundane. However, that's not the case for those separated by great distances.

One way to overcome that hurdle is to share more about your everyday life, no matter how monotonous it seems. Discuss your day! Talk about what you did at work, what foods you cooked for dinner, how you relaxed, who you met, etc. Those details are small, but they make up your life. Sharing those experiences provides greater insight into who you are and what you face daily.

That insight can make it easier for your family to bond with you and vice versa. It's a great way to build a bond, gain mutual respect, and feel like you're a part of each other's lives, even when you can't visit one another frequently.

There's no better way to bond than to see each other face-to-face! Try to visit your family abroad as often as possible. Of course, there are many challenges to doing this. International travel can be costly and time-consuming. With work and a busy daily schedule taking priority, finding the means to visit can be tough.

However, making an effort to show up and spend time together makes all the difference. It's how you prevent family ties from breaking over time. That in-person interaction can make up for years of separation, even if it only lasts a few weeks. It's an opportunity to spend time with one another and appreciate the bond you share. Furthermore, you can understand the lives of family members you can't see often, providing valuable insight into their everyday norms. When you return home, you'll have great memories to reminisce about and many things to get excited about for your next trip!

In the past, maintaining family relationships across international lines required frequent handwritten letters and costly phone cards. Fortunately, that's no longer the case. Technology makes staying connected easier and more accessible than ever. Use it to your advantage, and there's no reason why you can't have a flourishing relationship despite your distance and language differences. Here are a few tech must-haves that make all the difference.

Missing out on special occasions and big events can be painful and make bonding difficult. Life's biggest moments are important for both you and your family. Try your best to celebrate them together, either in person or virtually.

Whether it's graduation, the birth of a child, or a major career milestone, include your family. Consider celebrating those special occasions with a trip abroad! Celebrating a birthday or big life event by seeing your family can make it much more special. However, if that's impossible, include your family via video call. A video call can make them feel present, even if they're not there to spend the moment with you.

Active listening is a skill that can benefit you in many facets of your life. When building and maintaining relationships with family who live in another country and speak a different language, active listening can help you stay engaged while showing that you care. Concentrate on your family's words when you talk. Give them your full attention, cut distractions, and live in that moment. Respond thoughtfully, show them you're engaged, and have a healthy back-and-forth.

Allowing yourself to actively listen takes time, but putting in that effort can make your conversations more memorable as your relationship flourishes.

Finally, be patient and remember that challenges exist for both parties. Many people attempt to strengthen relationships with family abroad. But they give up when they don't see immediate results or find effective ways to break down language barriers quickly. Don't be that person! Be patient and understanding. It takes time to get things right, but your work is worth it.